Richie Rich has Bad Teeth? 

I am tired of writing depressing posts. Back to story time!


Two weeks ago I met a guy on Bumble. Let’s call him “Rich”, because that is constantly what he implied he was. To start off with, I could tell from photos he was a smaller guy. Shorter than I usually go for and I honestly wasn’t attracted to him at all. I didn’t feel like he was coming onto me either but we did talk about logistics, since supposedly he owned his own company, ripe at the age of 27. Originally we were suppose to meet up twice to discuss my company possibly doing his companies’ customs brokerage services.

I thought, “yay! Sales lead from dating app! Can I put this on my report?”

Thankfully I withheld the info! 

Both times we were suppose to meet up, he either got too drunk and didn’t have a ride to the bar. Like I said, I never thought this was a date thing. 

 And… Let’s face it, I am 5’8 and curvy like a Karadashian. I don’t date short string beans. No offense to those men, but I’m attracted to those above a certain height that make me feel smaller because  I will never been small!

Anyway, on Saturday he is finally in my neck of the woods. So I drive over to meet him around three in the afternoon. Like I said… I wasn’t thinking this was a date but a networking get together. And I assumed he felt the same way from his cargo khakis shorts(men, NEVER wears these when meeting a woman for the first time), a ratty old American flag tee, and a torn Arkansas state baseball cap.

Isn’t it funny when  how we envision people in our heads, even their voices and we are DEAD WRONG?! 

This dude owns his own company but he sounded like one of my red neck cousins who has never left the county. He wouldn’t look me in the eye at first either and while I know my looks can be intimidating (other people’s words, not just mind) I found it odd that he was having issues with it. He bragged about buying a Porsche earlier in the week, but one of his front teeth had a brown spot on it. 

Things just didn’t make sense. And the more he told me about his company the more I realize he was full of shit. I humored him and listened but I had nothing to add to this conversation. He was trying to offer me a job at one point to which I told him he couldn’t offer me.

After two hours, I told him I needed to head back to my apartment. He asked if we could keep hanging out later on and began imply spending more time together. And that’s when I realized he thought this was a date!!

Like I said. He was my height but weighed probably 115 pounds and had a brown tooth. Like if you can afford a Porsche you can afford to get your teeth fixed! 

Did he think I was desperate? Or that I believed all his BS?

Rich continued to text me all night. He even asked “are we hanging out or can I make other plans?”

I was honest and said I was hanging out with other friends and wasn’t feeling up to a bender, which is what he wanted to do. I’m pretty sure all of this is what set me up to go head first into missing my ex. 


7 thoughts on “Richie Rich has Bad Teeth? 

    • I don’t mind them later on but if a man is trying to impress me it falls flat. It honestly makes me think he isn’t taking it seriously and that he doesn’t have to try.

      • Yeah, they mean he is not trying. Which, might be fine if he has the swagger and looks of a A-list actor. For the rest of us, I means “nope.”

        I take it back, I did wear them once on a date. In my defense she is quasi-gothic. I have lots and lots of black teeshirts. So I wanted to impress her by also wearing black and something funny for her.

  1. And… If he thinks it is a date AND trying to hire you into a job, then he is begging to lose his company. He is going to do something stupid to lose everything when all the employees sue him at the same time.

    • He asked me out for tomorrow evening. Keep in mind he has continuous tried to get me to go to bars, something I don’t do in the middle of the week. So I said “I have plans,” which I do “also as I have said before I don’t drink or stay out late during the week.” He retorted that he wanted to take me to dinner. Ohhhhh so now he tries. Ugh

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