The Irishman: Part 1

I have been inspired by my friend Bunny over at SouthernGABunny to recall past conquests. For me, I have been in more “almost” relationships than real relationships. And this one, I wouldn’t even consider an almost… more like an Almost Almost relationship. More like an infatuation/crush on someone that would never amount to anything. I am changing all of the names to either nicknames or made up ones.


It was 2005 and I was a Junior transfer student at a small liberal arts university in West TN. It was about three weeks into school and I had mostly been around only females. I was going through RUSH and didn’t have much time to even think about guys let alone pay attention to who was around. At the time, there were about 600 people that lived on campus. And everyone had a meal plan. We all ate together in a large cafeteria.

And just like the movies, each table had it’s own clique. I was sitting with the new pledges for my sorority, then there were the football jocks and the water girls, the other two sororities had their tables as well as the fraternities, the table with the Asian foreign students, basketball players tables, nerdy guys, and lastly, the soccer team tables. One guys and one girls.

I wasn’t one of those girls that went to school to get her MRS. degree. So paying attention to boys wasn’t on my list of priorities.

I was standing in line for food, not paying attention to who was behind me. When I finally reached where I was up near the food I was very disappointed in what I saw. There weren’t any chicken strips left and the macaroni cheese looked a few weeks old. I let out a heavy sigh.

“It tastes better than it looks.”

I turned to my right to see a very sexy, hairy Irish man talking to me. I only blinked and he responded, “The food… you’ll get use to it.”

I could barely understand his Irish.

And that was the day that the Irishman spoke to me. I have basically had a thing for hairy bearded men since. Especially ones with accents. From there my crush development. I later found out that he was dating another soccer girl, who was cool as a cucumber. She was a year ahead of him and a senior that year, where as he was only a sophomore at school. When I asked some of the older girls in my sorority about him, they all freaked out that he even spoke to me. He was shy, intelligent, and very mysterious. He didn’t go out EVER and pretty much stuck with a few of the other soccer guys and his girl.

I crushed hard on him from afar. We had the occasional run in at the cafeteria.

Cut to two years later, my senior year at school (I had to add a year since I was a transfer). My crush for him was mostly still in my head and nothing I had verbalized. Me and my best friend from college made a pat that we would we be more adventurous that year and step out of our comfort zones. We made a list of goals for the year, one of them being becoming friends with the soccer guys. We already knew a few of the guys on the team so before school started we were invited over to one of their dorms to hang out. This guy was from New Zealand and always had the biggest crush on me (he repeatedly told me and he still checks in with me to this day) but he was currently dating my roommate.

When we arrived at the Kiwi’s room, there was a crowd of people already there. As I slide through the people I passed the Irishman. I said, “Hey. How was your summer?” He responded something so Irish I don’t even remember. And I went on my way. I don’t really remember the rest of the evening, what we did or who we hung out with.

Cut to a few days later, the Kiwi was over at my apartment visiting my roommate. He started laughing and said, “You will never believe who asked about you, MR. He talked about you for a day and he NEVER does that.”

When people say these things to me, I always assume the worst.

“The Irishman.”

I couldn’t even form a sentence but my roommate did! Apparently I wasn’t the only one who had a crush on the mysterious European. She was pretty jealous and Kiwi got a bit upset over it. I asked for every detail to which the Kiwi got a huge kick that I even cared.

You see, The Irishman’s girlfriend dumped him a year before right when she graduated. He was apparently too shy and quiet for her. Or that was a rumor at least as to why she dumped him. She wanted to stay friends and he refused. From there on he refused to date American girls.

When I asked Kiwi how I could possibly get in with The Irishman he suggested I become friends with his roommate, The Scotsman. Yes, he was from Scotland. I set out on my mission to become friends with him and the other Irish guys on the team. Surely if they all spoke highly of me, I could get in closer with the Irishman.

By November, I had developed a pretty good friendship with the guys. We would go watch their games ( my apartment faced the soccer field and was only about 20 feet from it) and we went out together a lot. The night before we all headed home for Thanksgiving break, one of the guys was hosting a party in his room in the dorms. Me and my best friend went hoping for a chance encounter with the Irishman.

I was not disappointed. Halfway through the evening, grandfather cardigan and all, he graced us with his presence. He asked for a beer and sat near me. We slowly struck up a conversation about music and Ireland. He showed me his first fake license and told me he was actually 4 years older than me. I learned that he didn’t go out because he didn’t see a need in spending the money. He also thought facebook was a sham and refused to have one (and this was in the early years when everyone in college had one) and didn’t have a cell phone either. He spoke a little about his family and why he ended up at our university. I in turned showed him you-tube for the first time and showed funny videos of cats. We were still having a great conversation when the hosts decided to break into the pool for a night swim. By this time it was so late that I needed to go home. I was sad to end it, but I knew that evening was a great foundation and just reinforced my crush for him. I left for Thanksgiving feeling like I may really have a chance with him….

To be continued….




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