Flatter Than My Hair On A July Night In Memphis

Although I was in Nashville.
But the humidity was just the same.

I had driven to Nashville right after work. Giddy and excited to see this man I had seen three days in a row that weekend before. I was excited and hoping that finally he would kiss me.

I was wrong.

Upon arriving he was dressed in just khakis, a red T-shirt and crocs.

Yes… Those CROCS.

I was pretty late and I had been stuck at a standstill on I-40 for over an hour. His casual dress could be explained. But still, when a girl drives 3 to 4 hours to come and see you, you may want to try a little harder.

“what do you want to eat?”

When a man asked me this question it means he doesn’t want to put forth the effort. This wasn’t my town. I didn’t know where we should eat.

I suggested Thai food but since it was so late we decided to just get takeout. A storm had rolled in and I got drenched on the trip from the car. I thought,”This is a perfect time for our first kiss.” We were both wet, hungry, and laughing at how we both ran to the door. I looked up at him and leaned in and then he veered to the kitchen.


My excitement deflated.

What had happened? Was it because my hair got wet and flat?  Was it because my ass jiggled too much on the run to the apartment? What happened from last weekend until this one?

He piled my plate full of food and we sat back and talked. Well, attempted to talk. He put the music on so loud that I could barely hear him. I requested that he turned it down because it was hard for me to concentrate. After dinner we got on the couch and still nothing. No touching. He spoke about how beautiful I looked. And once again I thought, “maybe now?”

Wrong again.

It had been three weeks, two trips to Nashville, and six days total. And still no kiss.

Instead he wanted me to hear every Grateful Dead song he could find on YouTube. By 10:30 I was bored to death and ready to sleep. I went to the guest bedroom and read blogs on WordPress until my eyes were too heavy.

This morning I woke up and he was in the same clothes. Even though I knew he had gotten up to go for his group run at 6 AM. He made a huge breakfast even with food I specifically told him I couldn’t eat: milk and wheat. He asked what I want to do for the day and I said, “This is your city , you pick.”

He decided we should go find a nice coffee place and talk.


This is exactly what we have been doing for over a month.

He tells me he had grabbed some great food to cook from the grocery store since it was a special occasion and that I was there. If I was so special why did I feel so… Not special? Like I was someone who was using him as an Airbnb instead of a potential love interest.

I said, “I wanted to be back in Memphis by six this evening, if that is OK.”

We ended up going for a walk across the pedestrian bridge. A couple asked if we wanted a photo of the two of us together and I politely said no. I don’t to take pictures with someone I’m not even seriously dating, is that wrong? He seemed concerned that I didn’t want to photo of us. I assured him it wasn’t him, just me not wanting a photo of myself.

We went for a drive around the city and he was telling  me all about it. Most of which I already knew. I was beginning to feel annoyed. I drove all this way to spend time with him, and he seemed more distant and opinionated than the last few weeks. I became annoyed with him. When he would talk about the “Batman Building” I said shortly, “yes, I know.” Because I did know. Was he not listening when I told him I used to come to Nashville twice a month for three years with my sister lived there during college?

At one in the afternoon it was his idea to head back to the apartment. I hadnt planned to leave until three but there was no reason for me to stick around at this rate. I went into the spare bedroom, I packed my things, and then he walked me to my car. He thanked me for coming and gave me a hug. He didn’t even tell me to let him know when I got back.

I guess he just wasn’t that into it. Or maybe he met someone else during the past few weeks.

I sent him text letting him know that I got home. He was glad he didn’t say anything else. Two hours later I sent another one saying I wasn’t sure what happened this weekend.

No response.
UPDATE: he said he was tired from the week and that’s why he was weird. I didn’t respond back.


18 thoughts on “Flatter Than My Hair On A July Night In Memphis

      • I have a wheat allergy.. I react the same way as someone with a peanut allergy. As for dairy I love it but it doesn’t love me.. I’ve been told that in the next year or so depending on my body. I will react to dairy the same way I react to gluten and it isn’t pretty. 😳😞 Happy I’m not aloneπŸ’–

      • I know how you feel! I have had the milk allergy since I was around nine and just in the last five years has gluten become an issue. From some reason people just don’t get it when I say I can’t have them both. Trust me, I would love to eat tons of pasta and drink a glass of milk. But I will be sick for days. You are not alone sister! Thanks for reading! I love your posts!

      • Well it’s nice to know I’m not alone… I only became allergy in the past four years. It was hard at first but now I don’t even think about it. I just have to make sure I have my benedryl or epin handy and all is well. I really enjoy your stories as well. I will have to plan a trip up to visit it sounds like. 😊

      • Memphis is a fun city for sure! I don’t have any single friends left really so it would be fun!

  1. Hmm, wonder if he is holding back because of some past experiences when he led on too early. Again I am only giving him the benefit of doubt. But I guess you would know better. Hope your next meeting, if and when it happens turns out to your taste.

  2. Ouch – sorry to hear you drove so far for a lackluster time, you are putting forth real effort and he’s just not on the same page. You aren’t doing anything wrong.

  3. Pingback: The Hookup On: Top 10 Books That Changed My Life – Hookup Culture

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